A hot mess

Yes, that's what I am. A hot mess. I believe this little saying came from my friend, Julie, when referring to patients who are crazy - literally crazy or have crazy symptoms and/or stories. In my case, I'm literally crazy.

Who wakes up and starts sobbing before the day has even started? Me. Who eats a leftover brownie for breakfast "because I can" and then feels guilty for feeding that to her baby for breakfast and and cries about where that brownie will end up {butt, thigh, little toe}? Me. Who appologizes to their husband for their emotional instability {while crying}? Me. Who cries after their Mom has called to see if baby is on the way and should they change their plans? Me. Who cries because it's gloomy, drizzly, cold weather and she can't get outside to walk? Me. Who cries because she feels she has nothing to do but wait for labor to start? Me. Who cries because when put in writing, realizes how much time and tears she's already wasted crying? ME! And all this is in an hour and half, friends! Now you understand when I say...I'M A HOT MESS!

Don't go pittying me, though - it might make me cry! ;) Ha! Not really. I'm not feeling sorry for myself, I'm just simply crying...or sobbing. I don't even think I'm crying because of a lack of patience, I'm just crying because...well, I started and I can't stop.

I need a distraction. The house is clean {honestly, if I tell Jake the house needs cleaned one more time, he might off me}. I need to get out of the house. But shopping = spending money and I don't really want to spend money. Okay lets be honest, I'd love to go shopping but anything I would buy at this point would be overkill and probably not really needed.

Oh well - I'll find some distraction. Maybe move furniture? Put some nails in a wall? Who knows.